The Hybrid: Ready Doesn't Matter

By Bobby Loesch on November 25, 2020 at 2:00 pm
Born Ready
© Matt Cashore-USA TODAY Sports
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The Hybrid is a weekly Big Ten football preview, plus relevant or whimsy games from the national slate

Two things before we get into it:

1) I am now part of the resistance.

2) Dabo is so bad.

And, honestly, it had to be said:

Not sure I'd go that far, but he's certainly at the forefront of my mind right now as it pertains to pertinent college football figures.

Also, this is a tweet that Sounds Big until you realize it means absolutely nothing.

I know he's a frustrated college student, but man, it doesn't really matter you were ready to play. There are a million outside factors. And that's why pandemic times are extremely challenging. I'm "ready" to see my family this week -- but it's not happening. I'm "ready" to board an airplane again. No. I'm "ready" to pack into a concert hall, dive bar, arena, etc. And sure, the last two weeks or so, I've generally done all of the right things to make that happen. But that doesn't mean everyone else has or that they were lucky enough to have that opportunity to try.

We could all probably do a lot better at looking outside of ourselves. With Trevor, I believe there is hope. Dabo has clearly learned no lessons from a lifetime spent around people who do not look like Dabo. He can go out there and throw passes to himself.

/shifts gears back into column's usual tone

There we go.

The Hybrid

"Everyone wants to say the right thing, but sometimes that's the other person's job."

Thursday

N/A

Friday

Iowa State (13) at Texas (17): 

/nods

Nebraska at Iowa (24): I know you gonna dig this.

/most enthused I've ever been about "Back In Black" being played

OK, let's talk trash.

BURNNNNNNN

--ED TOAST.

Notre Dame (2) at North Carolina (19): Historically, I've loved ND upset potential almost as much as randomly ranked UNC... but this game isn't doing it for me.

Do I even need to connect the dots on what fanbase would totally do this?

Stanford at California: It's becoming increasingly clear I will not get to make fun of David Shaw for anything new this year. But that's OK.

Oregon (15) at Oregon State: Oregon is 3-0 and somehow only has three regular season games left. Sheesh.

Cancelled

Washington at Washington State:

I hate college football COVID-19.

Honestly, relief was the first feeling I felt. That was a few days ago, so now my bad hopes are getting bad up. No matter. It was not to be. I needed an Apple Cup experience in 2020 about as bad as I need Michigan-Ohio State. #neveragain

Minnesota at Wisconsin (16): You know, Sconnie, when I told you you'd lose too last week, I didn't intend for it to be right away. (ED. NOTE: Cancelled!)

Utah at Arizona State:

Saturday

Ohio State (4) at Illinois: Donny is not playin'.

What was cooler: taking the hit without a helmet on or popping up to talk mad shit? I think you know my answer.

Operating with significantly less swagger? The Illinois punter.

Rodger Sherman had the definitive take on this video: "The best part is when there are no defenders on the screen and he makes a cut."

Kentucky at Florida (6): Please leave, Florida. Please.

Maryland at Indiana (12): /Penix Posse meeting begins

/Bobby walks up to address the group

Well, I heard y'all put up a fight. It's over now though. I'm sure there are cool records from the '80s which will begin to fall because of this team, but... I can't allow myself to care in that way anymore. No, it's not you -- it's me. And, well, we'll always have this.

Texas Tech at Oklahoma State (23): 

You know this (had to have) led to a "Bedlam was Bedlam" headline or take, and let's just all be happy we didn't have to experience that organically.

This was the only play I actually saw from the game:

bedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlambedlamWASbedlam

* * *

As someone who loves a good 'first name has the same first letter as the last name'...

...this definitely turned into a "So you like doughnuts, eh?"

Penn State at Michigan:

Aright, Penn State -- you can go.

jk

This play was one of my lone moments of pure joy during this college football season.

OK, Penn State you can go for real-for real.

* * *

YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU.

Michigan doesn't just wear a bright orange suit to a dinner party. They spill wine all over it. Red wine? No, both colors. And then they wring the red and white wine jacket out all over everyone else's dinner plates. Then they pick up the mushy winey food and put it on their heads as a mushy winey food wig.

Also, I also went out of my way not to show this last week... but he fucking did it again.

* * *

Aright, Penn State -- it's safe to come back.

If true, fuck you.

Coastal Carolina (20) at Texas State: Did Coastal drop five spots in the rankings without losing, or did I make up them being ranked No. 15?

Auburn (22) at Alabama (1): Went out of my way not to look up the context here solely so we could make fun of it without guilt.

Wahhhh, I still get to win, but not in the boring wayyyy wahhhhhh.

UPDATE: He gawn -- get well, Sabes.

Pittsburgh at Clemson (3): And now, a man who probably likes Dabo considerably more than yours truly, Clemson Tom:

I know you guys probably thought I was gonna come up on here and talk about Florida State quitting. Well, I'm not going to go that route because it's been over-talked about all week long. I will say this though: Boston College didn't have any problems coming to play Clemson when Trevor had COVID. Notre Dame didn't have any problems playing Clemson, whoever was out with COVID. A lot of other teams don't have problems with players not playing because of COVID. Magically, Florida State decided to be scared and did not want to play on Saturday.

Anyways, we have Pittsburgh rolling into town for what seems to be Trevor Lawrence's final home game as a Tiger. It's going to be a little sad knowing he’s going to be leaving us in just a few short games. The future does look bright the Tigers, even though we are losing a lot of talent. Pittsburgh is definitely going to come in swinging for the fences against us, but Trevor has basically had an entire month off to recoup and get healthy. So, I expect us to lay the hammer down and make a statement game against the Panthers from Pittsburgh.

We are completely healthy, and I can assure you the dominance will be on pure display Saturday in Death Valley.

Make sure you call all of your Florida State friends and let them know that you’re OK. I'm sure they’re concerned with COVID-19. I've never seen a bigger bunch of pansies in my entire life... well, there are also Ohio state fans, so I guess them, too.

Northwestern (8) at Michigan State: I rooted for Northwestern last week. I know. You can't control certain gut reactions. And maybe I was pissed after Sconnie stuffed Michigan into a locker (yes), and maybe I forgot how horrible Fitz is when things are rolling in Evanston (YES), but I truly have no regrets. There will be plenty of time for these boring assholes to fall off.

Karma is certainly on our side.

Colorado at USC (18): Can we just skip to Oregon-SC? Do they play each other?

/checks schedule

No. Well, I suppose it'll be in the Pac-12 title game, then.

...

The Pac-12 has a title game, right?

Cincinnati (7) at Temple: I watched the most Cincy I've watched all year last week... but went out of my way not to learn anything (though the QB seemed cool).

Rutgers at Purdue: Bleh, what a gross combination.

and blah blah blah, purdue got hosed against fleck in a meaningless season where nothing matters

This was actually cool, though:

In a just world, they'll end up with the stolen Wisconsin towels.

LSU at Texas A&M (5): Joe Burrow was cool, pure. He was one of us, I think. Now he's gone. But, for once, it wasn't college football. It was the just-as-worse NFL. Yay.

He even tears up his knee with dignity and poise.

Arizona at UCLA: 

Rough.

Wrapping It Up...

Happy Thanksgiving, y'all.

Bobby Loesch is a weekly contributor to Go Iowa Awesome. Follow him on Twitter @bobbystompy or email to bobbyloesch [at] gmail.com.

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